Monday, September 27, 2010

My husband says that is not in love anymore, but it is only in marriage for the sake of our children '


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Over the weekend I got an email from a woman who told me that she and her husband recently had a fight and snapped that once again, does not like, but that he was staying married "for the sake of children." He had no idea how to respond. Of course, was devastated. But she wondered if she should stay in a "loveless marriage" or if it would be dangerous to stay for the children of divorce in a family whereParents do not love each other.

E 'was for them, their feelings about the divorce and her feelings separated from her husband hard. Although she was angry with him, she wanted to love again and she wanted to work the marriage. If it is for her, there would be no divorce. Thus, in the following article will tell you what I said as we see the situation now, but also how to turn around theFuture.

Divorce Vs Parents who do not love their spouse, but from the perspective of the child (ren), I will. Receive, as their children well in the first course, is detrimental to a child growing up in a family. where there is no love at all but this woman was not the situation when both parents deeply love their children, both loved their children -. were so that his children, was maintainedresist.

That said, the divorce is devastating for children. Frankly, I had asked as a child, though I prefer to let my parents divorced, I would never fight again to see more, or I would have preferred if they stayed married, but aggressive, I would have picked the fight in a intact family every day of the week.

Well, to be honest, my parents were not fighting hand or be abusive physically and verbally. There was a lot of great timesso if you wanted to separate and, finally, disconnect all together, I know why not stay in good times as a springboard focus on aspects of the work. I know that parents do not live for their children, but I also believe that children prefer to tell their parents as parents happy in a loveless marriage is often not true -. at least from the perspective of the child, in fact, I believe that what the child really wants is for you to run, so you canall happy again - together as a family and is often more trouble if the divorce takes great financial strain for the family and there are drastic changes in lifestyle, which often makes the child feel guilty and caught in the middle. .

I know there are people who tell you that divorce was better for them and their families, but from personal experience, I'm not one of them. Now I have two step parents, both very nice people and I am noware small, younger sisters. Now I'm married to me and I realize exactly how difficult it is going, a wedding (actually, I almost divorced a few years ago), but forget the child in me still do not know how painful it was for to keep my parents, and every year at Christmas, when I celebrate with two families, it is only fair, you get sick. I know this is selfish of me, but it's really how I feel.

Your children do not want you to stay together for their own good, butWe want to find a way to a happy and united again: my mother's friends said the same thing: "You're not happy that your parents agree, and again, who does not have to struggle to hear more? "I think I was glad it was not the fight more, but what I really wanted him for his fight more because they had found a way to be happy again - together. I wanted to be happy for her - not separately.

Nobody is going toargue that there is a child growing up in a tense, unhappy at home well. But before you get a divorce, ask yourself if it is possible for your wedding (and not the state), so your child can grow into a happy home in change, which includes both parents. Sometimes this is not possible. I admit it. There are some issues that simply can not be saved, but I have seen many marriages turn apparently died, because both sides were engaged in such a way thathappen and finally found the right tools to succeed.

The separation of children from your marriage: This is a bit strange sound when I say it, but often with their parents while the children are the glue that holds, are often what most of the stress on the marriage of stay. with me while I explain. What I mean is that often children are two people who were deeply in love and turn the other concentrated in twoPeople who focus on their children once born. beginning are now less fans and more mom and dad.

I really think that "Falling Out of Love" or "do not love each other more," is to take the result or negligence, the time and focus to change, instead of changing emotions, or the fact that the chemistry is not gone. Often, the chemistry is still there - but you buried under a sea of obligations Often, when you press.everything else on the back burner for a while 'and only at the wedding and give your spouse the attention and appreciation of time that you did, you will notice that somewhere the two people who love each other there again.

And, frankly, is the best gift that you give the child of two parents who love each other, and their lot. But sometimes you have regular time away from children, give them this. It would be much better to have abit 'selfish than regular nights and have to grow into two separate houses.

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